Being Thankful

So since I found out that I didn't get the job, I have actually been quite well. Yes, it was pretty harsh to hear that I wasn't chosen because there is someone better than me (who would have thought??) but really, I am over it. I totally blew the interview too... I said lots of "ums" and "uhs" and I just really did such an awful job it is almost comical! I may not wholeheartedly laugh about it now, but I am suuurrre I will-- later down the road...

But anyway, onto more important subjects... I have realized that being a stay at home mom really is what I want to do, and where I want to be anyway. The grass is always greener on the other side, right? Yeah, 'um,' no. I tend to think that though, yet when I get to the other side, I wonder why I was ever even interested in that grass anyway. So, today I tried to put myself in the shoes of the Allison that did well at the interview and got the job. She would be putting her daughter into daycare full time, while driving an hour each way to work, getting there at 7:30 AM sharp!! She would also be trying to juggle finding a place to live in Blairsville so she would be closer to work, but would still have to endure the drive until she could move. It would be hectic and I would be working my tail off to get just the minimal done around the house such as vacuuming, dishes, making beds, cleaning toddler mess, etc. (I have grown to be very accustomed to an OCD home. I liiike it). It would be hard to get all of that done; in fact, almost impossible!

So, as I watch the DIY channel, drooling over granite countertops and stainless steel appliances, all which would have been included in the home that would have been bought with 2x our current salary, I think of what the alternate universe Allison would be thinking a few months into the job. I came up with this: "Hmm this nice house with all the amenities and plenty of room is totally nice, but how can I enjoy it when I am only here a couple hours a day? And, those hours are spent running around, trying to get everything done instead of spending time with my family." Then, I would watch the Sprout channel and reminisce of the days I stayed at home with my baby, when I spent all my time with her; although some of that time was stressful, it was completely priceless. I then wonder what it would be like to be back on the other side once again, where the grass was obviously greener.

I figured I would just save myself the trouble and stay where I am: on the side that always has green grass-- I just don't tend to look at it enough!